Topic: Things you WISH you could say out loud.

[Julians_Wife]

Well some of them I have said out loud but, hey that's just me and I'm sorry if this post offends anyone, but it's all in good fun.

Things You wish You Could Say Out Loud.


1. I can see your point, but I still think you're full of shit.

2. I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce.

3. How about never? Is never good for you?

4. I see youve set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.

5. I'm really easy to get along with once you people learn to see it my way.

6. I'll try being nicer if you'll try being smarter.

7. I'm out of my mind, but feel free to leave a message.

8. I don't work here, Im a consultant.

9. It sounds like English, but I can't understand a word youre saying.

10. Ahhh. I see the screw-up fairy has visited us again.

11. I have plenty of talent and vision; I just don't give a damn.

12. I'm already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth.

13. Thank you. We're challenged by your unique point of view.

14. Any connection between your reality and mine is purely coincidental.

15 What am I? Flypaper for freaks?

16. I'm not being rude. You're just insignificant.

17. And your crybaby whiny-assed opinion would be...?

18 Do I look like a people person?

19. This isn't an office, it's HELL with fluorescent lighting.

20. Sarcasm is just one more service we offer.

21. If I throw a stick, will you leave?

22. Errors have been made. Others will be blamed.

23. Im trying to imagine you with a personality.

24. A cubicle is just a padded cell without a door.

25. Can I trade this job for what's behind door ..1?

26. Too many freaks, not enough circuses.

27. Nice perfume. Must you marinate in it?

28. Chaos, panic, and disorder --- my work here is done.

[EvilTwin]

Good stuff JW.

My personal favorite: Fuck you, fuck you very much.

Does this face have a look of concern on it?

Ask me if a give a flying fuck.

[Maddoggystyle]

basically,,


drop dead mother fucker, keep your fucking eyes on my face not my tits ass wipe

hey prick get a fucking life or go jack off in the bathroom either way you might smile more often...


wow that was very refreshing lol

[Julians_Wife]

I love number 2 ....... that's a freakin classic .... ... watch me take this list and fit it into my posting (well some of it LOL)

[EvilTwin]

Another one I use on a regular basis:

Are you stoned, or just stupid?

[Tipsy McStagger]

they all sound like cheesy bumper stickers from the 80's

[Cappy]

Another one I use on a regular basis:

Are you stoned, or just stupid?

I use a variation of this, usually on skater kids at my work,

Are you retarded or just stupid?

Used that a few times, one kid answered once. That was funny, gave him a break after that.

[letsgo2smokes]

Another one I use on a regular basis:

Are you stoned, or just stupid?

I use a variation of this, usually on skater kids at my work,

Are you retarded or just stupid?

Used that a few times, one kid answered once. That was funny, gave him a break after that.

Would you say that to me if i was boarding outside the coke centre?   lol I skate there alot 

[Cappy]

Another one I use on a regular basis:

Are you stoned, or just stupid?

I use a variation of this, usually on skater kids at my work,

Are you retarded or just stupid?

Used that a few times, one kid answered once. That was funny, gave him a break after that.

Would you say that to me if i was boarding outside the coke centre?   lol I skate there alot 

I never bug the kids outside. It's the ones who try to do it inside, lol. So WTF, u never gonna come and say hi or what?

[letsgo2smokes]

Another one I use on a regular basis:

Are you stoned, or just stupid?

I use a variation of this, usually on skater kids at my work,

Are you retarded or just stupid?

Used that a few times, one kid answered once. That was funny, gave him a break after that.

Would you say that to me if i was boarding outside the coke centre?   lol I skate there alot 

I never bug the kids outside. It's the ones who try to do it inside, lol. So WTF, u never gonna come and say hi or what?

Well i promise next time i will..but i dont kno what you look like...ill just to the front desk and ask for captin shitastic....im sure i wont get any weird looks

[tan]

if the situation calls for a comment like that i would most likely be saying it.....i have always been knows for the comments i come out with....and usually not being rude on purpose i just have a bad habit of saying anything that pops in my head...haha

[Cappy]

Another one I use on a regular basis:

Are you stoned, or just stupid?

I use a variation of this, usually on skater kids at my work,

Are you retarded or just stupid?

Used that a few times, one kid answered once. That was funny, gave him a break after that.

Would you say that to me if i was boarding outside the coke centre?   lol I skate there alot 

I never bug the kids outside. It's the ones who try to do it inside, lol. So WTF, u never gonna come and say hi or what?

Well i promise next time i will..but i dont kno what you look like...ill just to the front desk and ask for captin shitastic....im sure i wont get any weird looks

lol, ya...my names Wes, look for the fat guy.

[SgtMeowsteen]

"So...just how long were you underwater in the stupid pool"

just popped out of my mouth last week

[pepperoni]

"Gee, I must have forgot that life is a popularity contest, well, here, let me give you a dumbfuck ribbon, you've won buddy!"

[kitty meiowenstein]

How much are you being paid to do your job and how little do you think I'm going to let you get away with doing?

especially works with cops and doctors.

I wish you'd had your tubes tied (and fuck off).  To in-laws who think it's ok to let their rug rats scream in your ear for 6 hours while they tip toe quietly away.

[Cappy]

"whatevers wrong with you is no little thing"

I believe i used that one here in the org already, 

[Drunk_As_Fuck]

One I do use at work when someone starts givin' me a detailed answer to a matter of fact type question is " whoooow, whooow there - you must have confused my curioucity with carring" lol!

I'd LOVE to be able to be "Donny" the screamin' guy at work:

"WHAT IN THE FUCK?"

"DON'T STOP ON MY ACCOUNT!"

"RELAX - YOU RELAX!"

"I DUNNO - DOES ANYONE WANNA SUCK MY COCK?"

Those are the ones that are most applicable but I could actually use "FUCK OFF WITH THE GUNS" sometimes as well .

[Cappy]

One I do use at work when someone starts givin' me a detailed answer to a matter of fact type question is " whoooow, whooow there - you must have confused my curioucity with carring" lol!

I'd LOVE to be able to be "Donny" the screamin' guy at work:

"WHAT IN THE FUCK?"

"DON'T STOP ON MY ACCOUNT!"

"RELAX - YOU RELAX!"

"I DUNNO - DOES ANYONE WANNA SUCK MY COCK?"

Those are the ones that are most applicable but I could actually use "FUCK OFF WITH THE GUNS" sometimes as well .

    fuck I'm with ya there!

[4bz]

My favorite is this one:  I look the fucker straight into their crossed eyes and say "Zippy, the PROBLEM is NOT the computer.  The PROBLEM is between the KEYBOARD and the SEAT!"  Taking care of the helpdesk can get pretty testy on the patience sometimes.

[Ms Vee]

I had one of those moments yesterday at work.  This lady was at my register and was purchasing various grocery items plus some golf balls.  Then she is on her cell phone talking to her husband, I guess, and says to him "I got your balls"  Oh my god, I wish I could have commented on that , but I doubt that I would have gotten away with it!

[SgtMeowsteen]

and says to him "I got your balls"  Oh my god, I wish I could have commented on that , but I doubt that I would have gotten away with it!

How you did not bust out laughing will be life's deepest mystery
That customer literaly HANDED you the rope to hang her with !!!!

See what happens when you talk on the cell phone in the grocery store?

Lucky for her you fear unemployment

[diesel69]

I don't know but I say everything out loud except " OH MY GOD I'M CUMMMING''
hehehe