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Author Topic: Stupid Kitchen Tricks  (Read 5467 times)

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bigbenjamin

Stupid Kitchen Tricks
« on: Feb 27, 2005, 05:54 PM »
Tonight I am making BBQed Chicken and Fried Chicken - lots of other shite too. Point is, I rubbed hot red pepper into the chickens and then rubbed my eyes :evil: !Holy Fack - I can barely see this screen - and I have used half a bottle of eye-drops. So that is my stupid kitchen trick for today . . 'bout you?

RumNCoke

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Stupid Kitchen Tricks
« Reply #1 on: Feb 27, 2005, 11:06 PM »
Today my roommate made chicken stock. Everyone knows how when refrigerated all the fat congeals at the top and can removed easily. Well my roommate didn't wait until the stock and pot were at room temperature before putting it in the refrigerator. I open the fridge later for a snack and I see a steaming hot pot inside. That's an excellent way of trashing your fridge. Everyone knows you don't put hot items in a refrigerator - at least that's what I thought. :roll: I immediately took out the pot and put it on the counter to cool.

Saucy Bastard

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« Reply #2 on: Feb 28, 2005, 02:49 AM »
When I checked out this thread earlier this evening, I wracked my brain,but could come up with no good kitchen pain to recount. Well, as fate would have it , a few hours later ,I made a terrible goof! My wife is laid up on the couch( Yesterday she Tore and Sepperated many of  the tendons on the top of her foot while on stage at a Highland Dancing competittion. The audience in the balcony could hear the crack over the sound of the bagpipes!!!) So ,needless to say, I'm waiting on her, hand and Foot. We were wathcing 6' Under ,when she got the munchies. After eating the Bugles ,a Pepsi ,an ice cream sandwitch , And a bowl of ice cream with whipped cream (she's trying to drown the sorrow of a dancing career that will be on hold for ??? months!).So then she wanted a " Mr. Noodles" (instant chicken noodle vegi soup in a Styrofoam cup). I've never made or eaten one  ,but  our daughter and her quite enjoy them. Boil water ,pour in to line ,let set a few min. ,serve! So I serve it to her (remember ,she's laying on the couch) and the way that I pass it ,she can only grab it with one hand ,up at the top rim! Fuckung hot water all over her hand and the side of the couch! I grabbed a glass of water , and dumped it on her hand. No blisters ,but 2 hours later ,it still hurts like hell and she has to keep dipping it  in a jug of water.  She is being very good about it , but I still feeel like a big jerk! :cry:

Thanks for starting this thread for me Ben! :roll:
"Why not go out on a limb? That's where the fruit is." --Will Rogers
"Get off that limb , that's where all the nuts are!" --Mrs. Saucy

-Why use a big word when a diminutive one will suffice?

kcrocks

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Stupid Kitchen Tricks
« Reply #3 on: Feb 28, 2005, 08:07 AM »
Hey Uncle Sauce instead of putting that career on hold she should start studying for her judges qualifacations for Highland. My sister just went through it. Alas only 2 of 18 passed (not her) and shes more eager to try again than ever. Great friends made in the process. My neice was at an award ceremony on Saturday in Etobicoke for the grand champions or some fucking thing.She won overall at Maxville this year which was awesome because thats where my family is originally from. I was there and watched award winning preformance from the beer tent! It was nice for her to have her whole family there. I know how you feel to be a proud uncle. I'd be proud of that kid champ or not.
once a trailer park boy always a trailer park boy

RumNCoke

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« Reply #4 on: Feb 28, 2005, 08:20 AM »
I hope your wife recovers soon, saucy bastard. Not being able to do what you love sucks.

goldensaint

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« Reply #5 on: Feb 28, 2005, 08:58 AM »
when i was 12 i thought that i could cook my bro and i a nice break-fsat before we went to school,seeing how my mom was hung-over in bed and there was no way in hell she was getting up.

so here i go pouring a whole buncha oil into a frying pan..then i add the bacon. YEP..so the oil splashes all over my thigh( i was wearing shorts) and burned a huge blister into me.It hurt so much and almost covered all my upper leg,then i accidently rubbed it on something and it popped...it got badly infected and i still have the scars now.
We are all faced with a series of great oppertunities brilliantly disguised as impossible situations.

shake

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« Reply #6 on: Feb 28, 2005, 10:17 AM »
Hearing these horror stories confirms my suspicion that the preparation of food should be left to professionals!

Mr. Stupidy Head

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« Reply #7 on: Feb 28, 2005, 10:59 AM »
:x  Ow!

Friggin' grease.

Saucy Bastard

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« Reply #8 on: Feb 28, 2005, 12:43 PM »
Quote from: kcrocks
Hey Uncle Sauce instead of putting that career on hold she should start studying for her judges qualifacations for Highland. My sister just went through it. Alas only 2 of 18 passed (not her) and shes more eager to try again than ever. Great friends made in the process. My neice was at an award ceremony on Saturday in Etobicoke for the grand champions or some fucking thing.She won overall at Maxville this year which was awesome because thats where my family is originally from. I was there and watched award winning preformance from the beer tent! It was nice for her to have her whole family there. I know how you feel to be a proud uncle. I'd be proud of that kid champ or not.


she's 1 set of exams away from becoming an associate teacer .After that ,the judge thing.

Crappy thing is that she was supposed to preform at the Vogue theatre in Vancouver for Celtic Fest ,her best exposure yet.
"Why not go out on a limb? That's where the fruit is." --Will Rogers
"Get off that limb , that's where all the nuts are!" --Mrs. Saucy

-Why use a big word when a diminutive one will suffice?

purple_skwirrel

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« Reply #9 on: Feb 28, 2005, 04:44 PM »
I just love it [note sacrasm] when deep frying cheese perogies and pulling them out when they're done, only to have couple that always manage to explode on their way to the plate.  POOF - cheese and potato spots everywhere  :?

Jaloopa

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« Reply #10 on: Mar 01, 2005, 03:25 PM »
just last week i was at the boyfriend's and wanted a green tea, so i pull out his kettle that probably hadn't been used in about ten years, rinse it, fill it with water, plug it in.  once the water starts getting really hot i thought i could smell something weird, so me being the genius that i am, pick up the kettle, stick my nose right over the hole and inhale, ever had blisters inside your nose?  not fun.  

i have to tell my bro's story too, oddly enough it also involves his nose... bbq-ing cheddar smokies (cheese stuffed sausages) he takes his right off the bbq, pops it in a bun and takes a big bite, cheddar shoots right up his nose!  he had nasty blisters too, not hard to tell we're related.
'i like children, but i don't think i could eat a whole one'

purple_skwirrel

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« Reply #11 on: Mar 01, 2005, 05:22 PM »
Ack!  I hafta get my post count off that evil number  :evil:

Um, let's see...

I used to have this really dumb collander that hated straining angel hair pasta...I finally got rid of it when almost an entire post's worth of angel hair went into the sink, right through the holes  :x

Detriot Velvet Smooth

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« Reply #12 on: Mar 01, 2005, 08:16 PM »
I just remembered burning my arm when I opened a bag of hot microwave popcorn when I was 10
I wanted a lady, not fuckin cory and trevor

bigbenjamin

Stupid Kitchen Tricks
« Reply #13 on: Mar 01, 2005, 08:25 PM »
Drinking and cooking with a kitchen full of helpers is my idea of fun - also a good way to get burned, cut, etc.
Recently I leaned against the counter and rested my forearm on top of a red hot metal toaster - didn't even notice for a few seconds - nice slotted pattern on my arm :? !

purple_skwirrel

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« Reply #14 on: Mar 01, 2005, 08:28 PM »
Quote from: bigbenjamin
Drinking and cooking with a kitchen full of helpers is my idea of fun - also a good way to get burned, cut, etc.
Recently I leaned against the counter and rested my forearm on top of a red hot metal toaster - didn't even notice for a few seconds - nice slotted pattern on my arm :? !


Oh, geez, I can't believe I'm gonna say this...did you put butter on it?  

bigbenjamin

Stupid Kitchen Tricks
« Reply #15 on: Mar 01, 2005, 08:48 PM »
I might put butter on you (caarazy about green women), but I always put ice on a burn :twisted: !

seriousguy

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« Reply #16 on: Mar 01, 2005, 09:27 PM »
One time when i was 3 years old I pulled a hot bowl of mixed vegetables out of the microwave and I was severely burned on my chest! whenever i get out of the shower I can still see where they got me, bastard peas.
Man Cut Ray! Truck drivin passed out phantom 309 mothafucka!

purple_skwirrel

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« Reply #17 on: Mar 01, 2005, 10:12 PM »
Quote from: bigbenjamin
I might put butter on you (caarazy about green women), but I always but ice on a burn :twisted: !


ROFL!  :lol:

purple_skwirrel

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« Reply #18 on: Mar 01, 2005, 10:13 PM »
Wow, a lot of accidents in the kitchen.  I wonder where it sits in stats compared to the rest of a household?   :-k

RumNCoke

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« Reply #19 on: Mar 01, 2005, 10:35 PM »
Quote from: purple_squirrel
Wow, a lot of accidents in the kitchen.  I wonder where it sits in stats compared to the rest of a household?

The bedroom can also be a dangerous place. Just ask John Wayne Bobbitt.

Saucy Bastard

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« Reply #20 on: Mar 01, 2005, 11:11 PM »
When I was 7 and my step bro was just learning to walk, he reached up ( he was VERY large!) and pulled a freshly boiled cup of tea onto his head!
His first two words were Hot and Tea!
"Why not go out on a limb? That's where the fruit is." --Will Rogers
"Get off that limb , that's where all the nuts are!" --Mrs. Saucy

-Why use a big word when a diminutive one will suffice?

misfit_ramone_TylerCat

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Stupid Kitchen Tricks
« Reply #21 on: Mar 02, 2005, 12:12 AM »
well today i made some pizza from scratch put sauce on and everything, when i put it in the oven and finished cooking and took it out i couldnt get it off the foil so i folded it over and when i got it off and de folded it the pepporoni an the cheese was all on one corner and the rest of the pizza had nothing on it except spots of sauce.......and once i made chicken wings being thats one of my fav foods tried to cook it i finished 6 fire alarms later!
We All Live In Fear Of Something
We All Dissappear Like Nothing
We All Live in Fear Of Something
We All Are Equal Less Than Nothing
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BoTTleKid

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« Reply #22 on: Mar 02, 2005, 02:50 PM »
Quote from: misfit_ramone_TylerCat
well today i made some pizza from scratch put sauce on and everything, when i put it in the oven and finished cooking and took it out i couldnt get it off the foil so i folded it over and when i got it off and de folded it the pepporoni an the cheese was all on one corner and the rest of the pizza had nothing on it except spots of sauce.......and once i made chicken wings being thats one of my fav foods tried to cook it i finished 6 fire alarms later!


Shit. :-( The pizza story bothers me, I can see it happening to me and being really dissapointed. Though I'm often pretty lucky when it comes to cooking.

The trick to stop that fire alarm problem is to yank the thing off the wall. That's what I did.
"...he keeps stickin' a fuckin' gun in my face."
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Detriot Velvet Smooth

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« Reply #23 on: Mar 02, 2005, 05:43 PM »
Quote from: bigbenjamin
I might put butter on you (caarazy about green women), but I always put ice on a burn :twisted: !


Actually you should just run it under cool water
I wanted a lady, not fuckin cory and trevor

bigbenjamin

Stupid Kitchen Tricks
« Reply #24 on: Mar 02, 2005, 07:46 PM »
Quote from: Detriot Velvet Smooth
Quote from: bigbenjamin
I might put butter on you (caarazy about green women), but I always put ice on a burn :twisted: !


Actually you should just run it under cool water


Why would i wanna run purple_squirrel under COOL water, when we already settled on the butter deal :twisted: ?